In my Weakness He Is Made Strong

I am notorious for looking at my weaknesses and exploiting them, making sure others know where my faults lie. I am also a person who does not view herself in the highest regard.  I do not have the highest self esteem and I have been working on that as God has placed some wonderful people in my life that know how to speak life to me.  This isn't something new, I've struggled with it for quite a while.  HOWEVER, I grew up in the MOST encouraging and loving household where every need and most wants (I don't think I was too spoiled, but my siblings may disagree :)) were met!  My parents pointed me to Christ daily and intentionally spent quality time with me.  My siblings and I have always got along and have some of the best adult friendships that I've ever known between siblings.  My husband treats me like a Queen and always has uplifting words for me.  He speaks to my heart and loves me so very well!  In my eyes, my husband is the man God made perfectly for me and I think he sees me the same way! Friends..I cannot BEGIN to explain how blessed I feel in this department!  Good truly stepped His game up when I prayed for mommy friends that are striving for Christ-centered marriages and families!  I say all of that because I know this is not an outside influence that has made me have low self esteem, or not see myself in the highest regard.  I believe the way I feel about my body and the flaws I see daily are a HUGE impact on my self-esteem...BUT, I am working on that and have been for the past 3 months...thus this new revelation I am writing about!!!  I also know that pretty much every woman has or will struggle with low self-esteem at some point in their life and I am not the only one. I hide this viewpoint of myself well (I think anyway).  I'm pretty upbeat and have a pretty positive personality most days.  My family and close friends who see me at my best and worst may need to chime in here.

Yesterday during the sermon at church our pastor was speaking about our strengths and weaknesses and how some people can excel at one thing while others struggle.  I've thought about this for...well, a day, but this spoke straight to my heart.  Our pastor went on to say that we have these weaknesses because this is where we learn to lean into and depend more on God.  What a revelation this was for me.  Sure, I've heard this before, but this was the first time I let it soak in to my heart.  I am unsure about myself in a lot of areas in my life, parenting, marriage, spiritual walk, friendships, just to name a few. I like to compare myself and we all know comparing yourself to someone else is one of the most self destructive things to do.  I do my best and other times I know I could've done way better.  But in my weakness, Christ is made strong!  He is molding me into the woman He can use daily by allowing me to see these weaknesses and lean in closer to Him.  When I depend more on God and I allow my kids to see this struggle between self reliance and dependence on God, I am showing them that it is okay to not have it all together.  It is okay to struggle and grow in Christ at the same time.  During this struggle is where I grow more into the woman He designed me to be.  I don't like having to learn the same lesson twice, but sometime it is necessary.  I can be stubborn, just ask my hubby!  I wish I wasn't, but again, I am working on that.  If I was perfect, I wouldn't need God.  But, this woman, NEEDS Christ and His redemption daily!

Strengths...I do have those, I am not all negativity and doom, I promise!  For instance, I am a very loyal friend, wife and daughter.  I don't turn my back on people especially if they are in need physically or if they need encouragement.  I do think words of affirmation are a strength of mine.  Not to toot my own horn, but I love to chat with people and lift them up to where they feel better about themselves after leaving my presence.  At least, that is what I hope I do.  Physically, I am pretty good at a lot of sports.  I am not as physically fit as I once was (again, I am working on that), but I do have good technique and skill set for most sports.  Don't ask me to golf or play tennis...that's just not my jam!  Baking!  I can bake with the best of them!  I will leave the cookie baking to one of my dearest friends because they truly are the BEST I've ever had! I can do them...but why, when hers are so much better?!?   But, cupcakes and cakes, I LOVE to make! I also LOVE experimenting with desserts and different flavors.  (This may have led to the not so physically fit part). These are just a few of my likes/loves and maybe even considered to be some of my strengths.   However, if I am not careful, I can see my strengths and not realize that those were given to me by God and I need to be thankful because there most definitely are areas of weakness that I need God's help and guidance.

Although I have many weaknesses and strengths, I am reminded that I am made in His image and the times I may not see myself in the best light, I need to remember that He made me perfect in His sight and any time I think too harshly of myself or get down on myself I am telling God that His work is not good enough.  This is not the attitude I want my kids to have of themselves nor towards God.  I will work on my weaknesses and learn through Christ's guidance how to push through them.  This will allow my kids to see me rely on God and not myself on a daily basis.   Ultimately, I want my life to be a reflection of Christ for my kids especially, but also for anybody else who may be watching.  My prayer is that God will shine through me and His character will be what people see in my presence.

What are some areas you can see where God needs to refine you?  WHat are your weaknesses?  What are your strengths?  How can you glorify God through your strengths and weaknesses?

Until next time,


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